Chapter 1158 — Why Didn't You Say So Earlier?
The Blossom Guardian · Page 1 of 2
"You really want to tell me a secret? Then what secret is it you want to tell me?" An Liwen asked with a frown.
"Brother An, we're in trouble! Something terrible's happened!" Su Taizao came running and stumbling over from not far off, panting and out of breath.
"Hold on a moment. What's so terrible? Wait until little Xiaoshu has told me her secret, then you can talk!" An Liwen waved a hand, signaling Su Taizao to calm down.
"Jianwen-gege, actually, what I wanted to tell you is that Xiaoxiao wanted to put a crab in your trunks..." Shen Yushu said.
"Then tell me, by all means. But why did you have to shout all of a sudden? Are you trying to deafen me?" An Liwen looked at Shen Yushu with some exasperation.
"No, that's not it. I shouted because Xiaoxiao was here just now and she put a crab in your trunks, and I happened to see it, and it gave me such a fright that I screamed!" Shen Yushu said, embarrassed.
"Ga!" An Liwen leaped up all over again, both hands clamped over his crotch, cold sweat breaking out on his forehead: "It's got my balls! It hurts like hell!"
"Oh, Jianwen-gege, the secret's been told, so I'll be off. Enjoy your ball-ache!" Shen Yushu waved at An Liwen and turned to leave.
An Liwen hopped about on the ground clutching his crotch, not daring to strip off his trunks in front of everyone, so he could only make a run for the tent.
Once inside, An Liwen yanked off his swim trunks in a few quick motions, revealing a little crab clamped neatly onto his balls.
"Taizao, come help, quick, I can't get any leverage!" An Liwen called out in frustration for Su Taizao to come lend a hand.
"Little crab, come down now, it's no fun over there..." Su Taizao bent his head and spoke to the little crab.
"Are you a crab yourself? Do you think it can understand you? Just help me, get it off!" An Liwen was beside himself. What sort of moment was this to be chatting with a crab? Was the man out of his mind?
Su Taizao dared not say another word; he carefully reached out and gave the little crab a tug. But that tug nearly brought tears to An Liwen's eyes: "My balls! You're yanking my balls off!"
"But... if I don't pull, it won't come off either!" Su Taizao was at a loss, unsure whether to keep pulling or stop.
"Can't you be a bit more careful? Pry its pincers open first!" An Liwen said.
"Well... I'll try..." Su Taizao nodded gingerly.
And so, inside the tent, a spectacular farce of wailing and ball-yanking played out, and a man who was literally suffering from ball-ache was born.
Meanwhile the two culprits, Shen Yushu and Feng Xiaoxiao, went back as if nothing had happened and joined Wei Zhao, Gu Mengyao, and Tang Zhi in their laughter and horseplay.
"What happened to An Liwen? He sounds like he's hurt?" Gu Mengyao had no idea what was wrong with An Liwen and asked, puzzled. His screams were so shrill that Gu Mengyao could hear them even at this distance.
"His balls hurt," Shen Yushu said.
"His... his balls hurt?" Gu Mengyao's face flushed at once. Though "ball-ache" was an internet slang term, it was mostly used of men, since girls had no balls and saying it aloud was hardly refined. Gu Mengyao especially would never use such a word, so hearing Shen Yushu say it naturally left her embarrassed.
Still, Gu Mengyao was a little puzzled: An Liwen had been perfectly fine, so how had he come down with ball-ache all of a sudden?
"His balls got pinched by a crab!" Feng Xiaoxiao explained to Gu Mengyao.
"Huh?" Gu Mengyao was stunned. She had no idea what it felt like to have one's balls pinched by a crab, but it surely couldn't be pleasant, and she couldn't help sighing: "How is he so unlucky? To actually get... get that?"
"I'm the one who put the crab there," Feng Xiaoxiao said.
"Ah?" Gu Mengyao's head began to ache. So Feng Xiaoxiao was behind it? And judging by Shen Yushu's knowing look, the two of them must have done it together. An Liwen really was unlucky. How had he run into these two little hellions?