Chapter 375 — Dismissal
Purple Streets of Chang'an · Page 1 of 4
Chen Yanzhou asked Dou Yan gently, "And what do you mean to do?"
"I mean to hold this family of ours together!" Dou Yan said, with great firmness.
.
Anyone would think the same.
Yet under the weight of the greater tide, how many ever get what they wish?
He thought of the men moaning in pain all through the courtyard, of Pang Kunbai, who still could not stand or walk; he thought of Dou Yan and Song Zhi facing each other down in the pouring rain, of the rare warmth on Song Yan's face as he steadied Dou Yan, an expression outsiders seldom saw — and suddenly his heart began to pound, and a restless excitement rose in him.
Chen Yanzhou knew it for what it was: the longing to seize a hand in the torrent of history and turn it — just as years ago, when he learned his official career was hopeless, he had burned to put his talents to use.
He smiled faintly and said softly, "I have traveled many places and seen many sights, and life in this world comes to no more than that. Madam need not worry on my account. Whatever you require, simply command me. My talents are modest, but I will bend my back to the task and not stop until death."
That last phrase comes from Zhuge Liang's Memorial on Sending Out the Troops.
Dou Yan understood his meaning without knowing why.
Yes — what did she have to fear?
Win, and you are king; lose, and you are a rebel.
If she failed, the Dingguo ducal residence would be the ruin left before her as a warning.
So she could only press forward.
What of the Prince of Liao? What of the Crown Prince?
What had they to do with her?
When she was locked in prison, it was Su Lan and Su Xin who shielded her, and Duan Bing and the others who pleaded on her behalf; when she was writhing in anguish over her past life and this one, it was Song Yan's stubbornness and ardor that set her heart beating gently again.
These were the people she ought to cherish, the people she ought to guard, the people she ought to protect with every ounce of strength she had!
She would go forward.
Through all the ages, how many heroes have died of hesitation.
She would go forward.
Just as she had done ever since her rebirth.
Onward, with unshakable resolve!
Together with these people around her who loved her, respected her, and held her dear.
Dou Yan laid a hand on her slightly rounded belly and smiled faintly at Chen Yanzhou. Her eyes, though, sparkled with joy like the morning star.
Bright and brilliant, dazzling to behold.
That Dou Yan of Zhending.
Chen Yanzhou rose, stepped back two paces, and slowly made her a bow. "Madam, I await your command."
Dou Yan laughed.
In this lonely world, one more companion means one more measure of courage.
She gestured for Chen Yanzhou to sit, and said, "These past days I have taken over the household affairs of the Yingguo ducal residence, and I have found something very strange. By rights, the Yingguo house has been honored for a hundred years; a family with such a lineage hands down not only titles and property, but deep networks of connection, and the loyal servants who sustain a family's prosperity.
"Those deep connections I saw for myself at the New Year.
"Not only the old tasseled-cap families of the capital, but ministers of the court and the garrisons stationed in every region — all sent New Year gifts to the Yingguo residence. Some of the imperial kin sent gifts of no small value.
"But loyal servants — to be honest, I have not seen a single one.
"Those about the Heir are mostly people from the Dingguo residence.
"Those about the Duke of Yingguo are mostly men promoted after Madam Jiang's death.